A New Pillow or Four

Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for.

Keep on seeking, and you will find.

Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.

For everyone who asks, receives.

Everyone who seeks, finds.

And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.

Matthew 7: 7-8

I had promised my son a new pillow.  I didn’t forget this promise, I just hadn’t made time to go get it. And, of course, he didn’t let me forget it. Many times over the period of 5 days, he reminded me. I found it rather annoying, to be honest. Did he just not believe me?

I went last night to Walmart and purposed to spend about $10 on a pillow for him. To my surprise, they were on sale and I was able to buy 4 for the price of one.  I got pillowcases as well. Right there in Walmart, I had this wonderful revelation of the giving nature of God. It felt so good to be able to give my son more than he had asked for, more than he was expecting, much more.  God isn’t limited by resources; He doesn’t need a sale at Walmart to bless His kids. And if I read this verse correctly, He isn’t annoyed by persistent asking. In fact, He tells us to do just that.  I don’t understand that, but I don’t have to. I didn’t write it; I only read it. Maybe, just maybe, what is standing in the way of my  miracle or yours is that, unlike my son, we give up. We just stop asking, or seeking, or knocking.  I mean, He heard us right? So why keep asking?  I don’t know, but I know this, God is looking for ways to bless His kids above and beyond our wildest imaginations and He tells us to keep on asking.

What have you given up on?

Have you stopped asking?

Perhaps it’s time to start again and see what only God can do.

I admit, Jesus, that I give up far too quickly. I don’t keep asking, I think I must be pestering You if  do. Forgive me for limiting You, for not taking this word and applying it passionately to my life. Help me to be persistent in my faith and in my pursuit of healing, not just for me, but for all those you have put in my path and laid on my heart. Bring Your healing, I ask, touch these lives as only You can do. I ask again, in Your name. Amen.


The Puppy and the Peanut Butter


“Faith consists in believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe.”   

As I write this, our Goldendoodle puppy Sadie is persistently attempting to clean the insides of an empty peanut butter jar. She has the top part really clean but hasn’t figured out how to get her face and tongue far enough down to clean the bottom.  She has been working on this for over half an hour! She has gotten the label all the way off and has bent back the edges of the plastic jar enough to get her face further down, but there is still peanut butter to be had.  Watching her determination is funny and heartwarming and sometimes, makes me think that maybe she isn’t all that smart.  Or maybe she’s smart enough to know that persistence pays off. Even if to others it looks like a lost cause.

I think that sometimes of my pursuit of healing. Why not just give up and accept that this is what it is and move one?  I would bet that to others that my determination may at times seems odd and, at times, may seem heartwarming, and maybe at other times, it just seems like, well, maybe she just isn’t all that smart. To me, though, there is something bigger at stake than getting the last bite of peanut butter. My healing, your healing is worth pursuing. It has been paid for and the price was high: Jesus taking all our diseases on the cross with Him to put an end to their destruction in our lives.

God made it clear in scriptures that Jesus came to do the will of God and Jesus went about healing all. ALL.  I am sure that sometimes, these people who came were to Jesus looking for healing were viewed as odd. I mean, who tears a hole in a roof to let someone down into the house on a pallet? That’s major league cutting in line, not to mention just plain odd. But they persisted and the man was healed. If I had been willing to say enough is enough and move on when we were believing for our son John, I am not so sure he’d be here today. I can’t help but wonder what other miracles I have missed because I was unwilling to persist to the end.  I don’t want to quit believing for my healing any more than Sadie wants to give up on that last bit of peanut butter, regardless of how it looks to others (and myself at times).

Jesus, You know the struggles I have had with faith, how it waxes and wanes, how some days faith comes easy and others, not so easy. Help me to be steady, to be persistent to the end when I see this promise of Yours manifested in my life. I’m not resting in my ability to believe, but resting in the faithfulness of Your love, Your character and Your word.  Thank You for bringing our promised son, John into our lives when it seemed impossible, and thank You for this healing You bring into my life even when, at times, it seems impossible. Forever Your humble follower, I thank You. Amen.

Full Moon

God’s Message, from the God who lights up the day with sun and
    brightens the night with moon and stars,
Who whips the ocean into a billowy froth,
    whose name is God-of-the-Angel-Armies:

 “If this ordered cosmos ever fell to pieces,
    fell into chaos before me”—God’s Decree—
“Then and only then might Israel fall apart
    and disappear as a nation before me.”

Jeremiah 31:35-36

Last Friday night, there was full moon. We watched it rise, starting out huge and yellow as it made its way up the night sky, getting smaller and whiter in appearance. I was reminded of this verse. It tells me of God’s faithfulness to His people. If the moon rose in the wrong place, or the sun refused to set or the stars collided and fell, we would have cause to doubt God’s faithfulness. I haven’t seen that happen, have you?

If God can keep the “ordered cosmos” from falling to pieces, if He can keep the nation Israel from falling apart and disappearing as a nation, then surely He can keep His promises to me.  And to you.  How about these promises?

He gives power to the weak
and strength to the powerless.
Even youths will become weak and tired,
and young men will fall in exhaustion.
But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.
They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
They will walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:29-31

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord.“They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

Jeremiah 29:11

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,

for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 

Matthew 11:28-29

As beautiful a sight as the full moon is, to me, what is more beautiful is the faithfulness of God it points to.  God has great and wonderful promises for us. Promises He stands behind and promises we can stand upon.  Need healing? Rest? Are you weary and burdened? Does your future look dim, are you weak and powerless?

His promises cover our weaknesses. We can trust in them and every time the moon rises and the sun sets at their appointed time, we can be reminded of His faithfulness to His word.

Your ordered cosmos is a beautiful sight to see and such a wonderful reminder that You stand by Your word and You hold all things in the palms of Your hands. I need the reminder of the full moon because sometimes, I forget that You are in control. How often do I try to take that control back? Forgive me, help me lay my burdens down and rest in the knowledge that You and only You can make something beautiful out of my life. Thank You for the good plans You have for my life. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.


The Cart Before the Horse

Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

Mark 11:24

If I had a dollar for every time I have read this or heard teaching on it, I could take everyone of you who reads this to Starbuck’s for a coffee!  Don’t head out just yet, I said IF! But the other day, I got it.  Call it revelation or an AH HA! moment, but I realized how my thinking had been wrong in this area.  Oh, I believe that I am healed; that it is a done deal but still there were thoughts that camped out in my mind that went along the lines of “when I am healed…”.  I was measuring my healing by symptoms and after only a few moments of being awake, I would know, not today, maybe tomorrow. Having no pain would be evidence of my healing for sure and then I would know that my faith had worked. But that is like putting the cart before the horse. My faith comes first, then my healing, then no pain. In that order.

Reading Kenneth Hagin’s book I saw it more clearly.  He writes

 “When you pray, you have to believe that you receive healing, and then you will have healing.

When are you going to have healing?

After you believe you receive it.

When do you believe you receive healing?

Before you have it.

Faith feels like resting. Not wrestling. Faith is assurance; doubt is constantly looking for reassurance. I was looking for reassurance; looking for evidences that my healing had come. I certainly haven’t been resting. Not the rest of faith. And I was wrestling  – asking would this help? what if I did this? or didn’t do that? Would anything I did help?

I believe the only thing I can do that will help is to believe. Believe in spite of the evidences to the contrary. Believe even when it seems useless. Believe even when I feel like giving up. Believe that my prayer of faith intersected my healing. Believe that the Savior who came to heal me meant it when He said, “It is finished”.

Jesus, my Savior, my Healer, my Comforter, my Friend, my Great Physician, I believe. I believe You paid the price for me to be sin-free and pain-free. You took it all upon Yourself on that cross. The stripes You took were for me; the blood that You shed, You shed for me. For me! And all You asked of me was that I believe. Jesus, I believe and once again, I marvel at Your goodness and am humbled by Your presence in my life. Thank You is inadequate, but I do thank You, from the bottom of my heart. Thank You, my Jesus. Amen.

The Children’s Bread

I have dogs. Four of them. They love our leftovers and any crumbs that fall to the ground are fair game. Fastest to get to the spoils wins. More than anything, though, they would dearly love to just take our plate and have first pick of what’s there. But they are dogs and get crumbs.

Matthew 15 tells the story of a woman who was outside of a relationship with Jesus. She was a Canaanite and while she had probably heard stories about Him, she didn’t have a relationship with Him. Her daughter though, was “cruelly demon-possessed” and she had no where else to turn. So she approached Jesus. At first, He didn’t even answer her request for mercy and then when He did respond, He told her that “it isn’t good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs”.

Oddly enough, she persisted. He just called her a dog (Gentiles were referred to as dogs at that time) and she responded with, “Yes, Lord; but even the dogs feed on the crumbs which fall from their master’s table”. He commended her for her faith and healed her daughter.

I don’t know about your home but bread is pretty much a staple around here. Regardless of the grocery budget, there is bread in the house. It’s a rather common, easily found sustenance. And Jesus related healing to bread and not just bread but bread crumbs. Healing isn’t meant to be something reserved for special people at special times and only under special circumstances. Healing is as common in the kingdom of God as bread is to the American diet.

Healing is the children’s bread. Jesus said so and so it must be true. This woman picked up what He was laying down and her daughter got healed as a result of her faith. She was persistent in pressing in for her daughter’s healing. We should be so persistent.

Lord, I humbly come to You today looking for my daily bread. My healing that You promise. I have no where else to go and just like the woman in this story, I will, by Your grace, be persistent in pursuit of my healing. I am grateful for the work You are doing in me through this trial and I am grateful for Your continuing presence in my life. And I am grateful now for the day to come when my healing is evident. Thank You Jesus, thank You Jesus, thank You Jesus. Amen.

And The Answer is….Who


Why God, why?

When God, when?

How God, how?

Where God, where?

Ever cry out to God with questions like that?  I certainly have.  One night during a time of chronic pain that lasted 8 years, I had this dream:

I was sitting down face to face with Jesus.  I was asking him all my questions about healing.  He patiently answered every single one and it took a very long time.  I knew I would never be able to remember all of this and I really wanted to; it was so amazing.  I needed to write the  answers down; other people would want to know this.  So I found a scroll of papyrus and began writing and writing and writing.  But as soon as I wrote the roll began disintegrating.  I wrote faster; it disintegrated faster and I wrote faster still and it just disintegrated faster still. I was getting frantic.  How could I be healed if I couldn’t remember what He said.  How could I tell people all of this if I couldn’t keep the paper intact.  Finally, the scroll just dissolved.

All the answers were gone -vanished.  None even remained in my memory. I looked up from my empty hands and saw Jesus sitting there smiling at me.

Then I woke up.

Seems I had been asking the wrong questions. 

Instead of asking why, how, when, where, I should have been asking who. 

And the answer is Jesus.  When all else fades away, the answer is Jesus. 

When the doctors can’t answer my questions, the answer is Jesus.

Too many times when the diagnosis comes, or the pain comes, or the symptoms are screaming at me, I tend to ask all the wrong questions. Instead of asking why, how, when, where, I should be asking who.  And the answer is Jesus.   I tend to look at everything but Jesus. My focus becomes on me, on my pain, on my limitations, on my symptoms, on my ability to do all the spiritual disciplines the faith healers tell me I need to do to build my faith so that I will have enough faith to be healed. Enough!

 I don’t need the answers written on that scroll – the answers He gave me that night in my dream.

I need to remember one answer and one answer only:


And all the other questions will be silenced.

Jesus, You were then and You still are today the only answer that satisfies the unanswerable questions in my life.  Jesus, the same yesterday, today and forever.  The God that healed me then and the God that heals me now, thank You. All that is good and right and healed about my life is because of You and words like thank You sound so inadequate.  How do I thank Someone for saving my life -for giving meaning to my life?  Thank You for being the answer to the deepest longings of my heart.  Amen.

P.S.  I did receive healing for that pain.  If interested, you can read about it in my post entitled “The Miracle of Blogging”.



It Feels Like Heaven


Jesus sent his twelve harvest hands out with this charge:

“Don’t begin by traveling to some far-off place to convert unbelievers. And don’t try to be dramatic by tackling some public enemy. Go to the lost, confused people right here in the neighborhood. Tell them that the kingdom is here. Bring health to the sick. Raise the dead. Touch the untouchables. Kick out the demons. You have been treated generously, so live generously”.  Matthew 10:7-8  Message Bible

A fifth grade boy I work with is extremely sensitive to the Spirit of God.  He makes comments sometimes that amaze me.  He doesn’t talk about God; I have no idea if he is a Christian or not, but I do know he is spiritually perceptive.  One day, he was working on a word search puzzle, bent over his paper and I came up to say hi.  I placed both of my hands gently on his shoulders.  He turned around quickly.  His eyes were big as saucers and he said, “don’t touch me”.  He has never refused a hug or a pat on the back so I asked him why.  He said, “when you touch me, it feels like heaven”.  I asked why that felt bad to him and he couldn’t answer.  I wasn’t sure what to make of that.

We, as Christ followers, filled with His Spirit, have the ability to touch others for heaven’s sake.  A touch that isn’t always welcome. We are to be the harvest hands of Jesus sent out with a charge.  A charge to tell people that the kingdom of God is here.  A charge that includes bringing health to the sick among other things.  People aren’t always so comfortable with the kingdom of God, even some Christians, especially when it comes to divine healing.  Divine healing is a divisive issue in some Christian circles.  I know people who have been hurt by other Christians when their healing didn’t manifest according to their schedule.  Jesus made it very clear here, however, that we are to bring health to the sick.  Health He would purchase on the cross.

If you are believing for a healing that hasn’t yet manifested, you may have to look beyond church doctrines, beyond well-meaning people of faith, beyond present experiences and look to Jesus.  What does He say about healing?  He said it is part of the kingdom of God that is here.  Now.

Thank You Jesus for thinking of me when You were headed to the cross.  Thank You for showing me what the kingdom of God looks like and showing me that it is for me here and now as well as for an eternity.  Help me to keep my eyes on You through this healing process and help me to bring health to the sick as I proclaim Your kingdom.  Amen.

Do you need healing?  I would love to pray with you and for you.  Please let me know.

Do you have a healing testimony?  I would love to hear it and share it with others.

The Report of the Lord

So it had come to this – me standing in the surgeon’s office looking at x-rays of my shoulder.   My left shoulder had been in constant pain.  My left arm was useless because of the pain.  I couldn’t lift anything; I could barely move my arm at all.  Just trying to take the covers off of me to get out of bed was extremely painful.  The sharp pain had come on so fast and remained so long and I had seen doctors to no avail and now a surgeon.  I don’t know much about x-rays but even I knew something was wrong.  There were no bones showing in this X-ray.  No shoulder bone, no collar-bone, no arm bone showed at all until closer to my elbow.

I was fascinated by that and only partially listening to the surgeon.  The bones, he said are not showing up because of inflammation and he went on to describe the surgery he was convinced would make me all better.  Something about bone spurs and rotary cuff and lengthening a tendon or was it a ligament?

I wasn’t really listening.  Surgery was not an option – I had no insurance and certainly  didn’t have a large enough savings account to cover surgery costs.

Not knowing what else to say, I asked him how I got this way.

He knew my past – that I had lived in Montana and had horses and dairy goats and raised beef and pork for our family.  He knew that meant lifting heavy bales of hay and straw and carrying 80# bags of feed and lifting saddles on and off horses.

He answered, “These kinds of injuries can come on because of overuse”.

As soon as he said those words, I heard the Holy Spirit rise up in me and say, “No, you were not created to fall apart with use.  God restores your youth like the eagle” ( Psalm 103:5).

Then he continued, “And some people are genetically predisposed to these injuries”.

At that the Holy Spirit rose up big in me and almost shouted, “No, you were not genetically predisposed for this.  You were fearfully and wonderfully made”  (Psalm 139:14).

Inwardly I rejoiced, outwardly I told the surgeon I would get back to him.

I walked out of that office healed.  The pain in my shoulder left as soon as the Holy Spirit gave me those words; the report of the Lord!  That pain has never come back and I never had the surgery.  It has been 8 years now!

The Holy Spirit has been called our Comforter, He is the one who brings to our remembrance the Word of God that has been deposited in us so that in moments when we can’t think rightly, He is there with just the right words for that moment.  Isn’t that awesome? Isn’t that comforting? God’s Word is the tool He uses.

Thank You Father for the gift of the Holy Spirit, our resident Counselor.  Thank You that Your words have power, power to heal and power to mend.  Help me to remember that the report of my Lord is always greater than the report of the doctors.  Amen.

reprinted from my blog  godhappenings.wordpress.com

New Address

For He delivered us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son.  Colossians 1: 13

When we begin our new life with God through Christ Jesus, we are not only relationally changed, we are positionally changed.  Our old address is the domain of darkness and our new address is the kingdom of His beloved Son.  Things operate differently in this kingdom than they do at our old address.  In this kingdom we are told that the way to life is to die to ourselves, that giving is better than receiving, that miracles are the norm and not the exception.  The currency that moves things in the domain of darkness is money, but the currency that moves things in the kingdom of His beloved Son is faith.

Remember the story of the woman with the issue of blood?  She had spent all her money on doctors to no avail.  Money that is the currency of that kingdom did nothing for her when she needed healing.  I don’t know about you but I have spent a good deal of money on doctors to be here today in pain and having no answers coming forth from them anymore.  Sometimes, even though money is the currency at my old address, it simply doesn’t always bring the goods I need.

Jesus, seeing that woman’s faith, healed her.  The currency in the kingdom of my new address brought about her healing.  Faith still moves the hand of God.  Faith can bring the goods that money can’t.  (I am not saying don’t see doctors; please don’t hear me wrong).  Romans 10:17 tells us this:  So faith comes by hearing [what is told], and what is heard comes by the preaching [of the message that came from the lips] of Christ (the Messiah Himself).  And did Jesus say?  He said, “Your faith has made you well. Go in peace”.

Jesus, my Healer, my Savior, my Soon and Coming King, how I love that You love me, that You see me, You see the faith I have and the gap between my faith and trust.  Help my unbelief, help me to trust.  How I long to hear You whisper those words to me – your faith has made you well.  Go in peace.  Thank You for I know I will hear them.  Amen.